28 Years

It still seems like just yesterday. My father used to stand in the balcony of our home facing the Arabian Sea. He loved standing out there, leaning over the railing and think. Sometimes I would stand next to him. As a little girl, I wondered why he was always thinking and about what sorts of things. He was a quiet man and a deep thinker. I understand it now as an adult. Sunrise and sunsets have a special place in my life. Changing colors of the landscape keeps me focused and grounded. In those moments, there is utter silence in mind and around me.

Sun setting behind the Olympic Peninsula

As a person, he liked his space and nature. I imagine growing up in a countryside near farms and river had everything to do with that. He loved growing potted gardens in our small balcony. I can still smell the marigolds, jasmine, roses and the fish fertilizer all just the same! My mother used to get upset when he brought the fish fertilizer home. We did not like the smell either but he used it anyway to make his garden bloom. Birds would make nests in the pots and it would be difficult to water the garden. Every spring we watched the babies learn to fly as if there was a private screening of an episode of National Geographic Channel.

I always thought he and I had a special bond. As I grew older, I learned that he was the only caregiver to my siblings and my mom when she gave birth to me. This was not a very common thing in Indian culture. I feel special just thinking about it. As much as I like to believe he loved me more, that is just not true. My siblings may beg to differ!

Sometimes I think I am very much like him. Growing up, I preferred sitting in our quiet living room,  draw and color while my siblings went out to play. I filled up every blank paper I got my hands on with sketches and rolled it up as my personal collection of art. I still find myself spending hours alone, working on my quilts, perfectly happy and entertained.

He was proud of my art. So much so that he would take my work to show off to anyone who would care. It was embarrassing at times but he did it anyway. No one who entered our home, left without seeing what I had been doing that week. He encouraged me to be the person I was supposed to be. Going to art school wasn't a right move for my future according to many, but he saw me there.

"Sunset" from Cultural Fusion Quilts

My father passed away 28 years ago today. I was 23 and it had been only couple of months since I had left India for this country. I spent many months/years feeling sorry for myself that he did not get to see me grow up. As an adult, a wife, a mother and as an artist, but that's how it was meant to be! 

My book is a tribute to my father. He taught me the most important lessons of life in relatively short time we had together. "Sunset" quilt means a world to me! I almost did not include it in the book just to keep it for myself but at some point during the process of writing I realized, I already have the most amazing, living reminder of him.

  

Exactly eight years later on the day of his passing, Kavita was born! My mother was with me to help with my boys and the new baby. My baby turns 20 today! I am not sure where the years have gone by!

Kavita is a tree-huger, philosopher, artist and writer, bust most of all a deep thinker and she has her thinking bun to prove it! 

I have always missed his presence but I have never been sad on this day since Kavita's birth.

For I have experienced the best sunsets and sunrises in my life. 

An early morning walk on the trail in Redmond, Washington

No matter where I am.

Sujata